The Big Three
by Maelynn Meep
Summary: A four-shot friendship piece on Kirk, Spock and McCoy's friendship. No slash! There will be four parts, three with just two of them and the last one with all of them. Very humor involved. Fluff.
1. Spock and McCoy

**The Big Three**

_By Tuba321_

**A/N:** This is a friendship piece on Kirk, Spock and McCoy. There will be four parts, three with just two of them and the last one with all of them. I love the friendship these three have so this is fuelled by that. I intend to finish this one!

**Disclaimer:** (sigh) No…. I don't own them…. But kidnapping is always an option.

* * *

_**Spock and McCoy**_

**M**cCoy sighed as he sat down in his seat in his medlab. Today had been a bore, he reflected, nothing interesting. He felt a twinge of guilt on his part. He was a doctor, shouldn't he be happy that nobody got hurt today? The thought was tossed around in his head for a bit. Sure, he thought, but even someone coming in with the flu would be more interesting than this silence.

He slumped in his chair some more and put his legs on his desk. He closed his eyes. If only he had a cowboy hat, he mused. He relaxed some more. Maybe he could take a nap…

"Doctor?"

Startled, McCoy flinched and tumbled out of his chair and, without grace, fell to the floor. He looked up. Damn that Vulcan!

Spock stared down at him with the usual intensity. His face was the usual mask of the emotionless. Neither worry nor sympathy was upon his face for McCoy's tumble.

"Do you require assistance doctor?"

McCoy grumbled, slowly getting up with the grace of a rock climber with two broken arms. "No I'm fine." He spat sarcastically.

"Indeed." Spock replied seriously, making no move to help.

McCoy sighed. He forgot, yet again, that Spock generally did not recognize the difference between sincerity and sarcasm. He finally pulled himself upright. "What can I do for you Mr. Spock?"

"I require the data on the mammalian creature of Juva III." Spock said, putting his hands behind his back in what McCoy had deemed his 'Superior Vulcan Pose'.

"Right."

McCoy started searching for the data. He started at his desk. Finding none he continued to sweep search the room. As he was doing this an idea came into his bored head. Of course!

Smirking, he finally found the data next to his own computer. He handed it to the Vulcan who raised an eyebrow at the doctor's expression but did not inquire.

He was putting it into his pocket when McCoy asked, with a hint of glee, "Aren't you off duty?"

"That is correct." Now Spock was moderately interested. What was the good doctor playing at?

McCoy had started outright beaming. "Want to play a card game?"

An eyebrow went up in response.

* * *

"Alright the name of the game is BS." Said McCoy a few minutes later, shuffling the cards Vegas style on a spare biobed they were sitting around.

Spock shifted. "And what does 'BS' stand for?" He asked innocently.

McCoy grinned at him, blue eyes gleaming mischievously. "Bull shit."

"Ah." Spock replied, looking, in his own Vulcan way, like he wished he had never asked.

"You do get it don't you?" McCoy asked seriously, leaning towards Spock over the bed. When the alien didn't respond, McCoy gave him that mischievous Cheshire grin again. "It's a term we use on Earth for lies."

He continued to shuffle the cards. "I would have liked to play poker but I really don't think…" He paused, waiting for the right word to come to him. Spock raised an eye brow. McCoy nodded. "Yeah. That wouldn't have worked."

Pushing the fully shuffled cards onto the 'table', McCoy started distributing the cards. He explained. "In BS you start with the ace of spades. From there you go up. The next person puts down a two and the next a three until it repeats." He finished dealing the cards.

"But what if the player does not have the necessary card?"

The doctor smiled at him. "They lie. And if the other person finds out, they get the deck or if you are wrong, you get the deck."

Spock started. "But Vulcans do not lie."

Smirking, McCoy responded. "I know." It was one of the Vulcans main rules, along with logic and peace. "That's what's going to make this game fun." He laughed a bit as he put down the first card. "One ace."

* * *

Kirk was roaming his ship. He enjoyed these little walks, especially after a tough day. Or even a quiet one, he mused, like now. He smiled lightly, in a pleasantly happy mood. All was quiet—

"You hobgoblin! You must be cheating!"

Or _was_ quiet… Kirk quietly changed his pace and course and quickly reached the door to the medlab.

"I assure you, doctor, that I am not cheating."

"Fine! Three queens."

"One king."

"BS!"

Kirk peered in through the partially open door. Inside where his XO and his CMO sitting around a biobed, apparently using it as a table, while they played an apparently scandalous game of cards. He watched as Spock turned the last card over. It seemed that this was not a good thing for McCoy, who groaned and picked it up, grumbling. He was holding a rather large pile of cards while the Vulcan only had three.

McCoy took his time and shifted through all of his cards, pulling out all of the ones he needed. He placed them down on to the new pile. "Four aces."

"Two twos." Spock replied, putting his own down.

"BS!" McCoy seemed a bit desperate now. The game that he'd thought would be an easy win turned out to be a total failure on his part.

"I told you doctor," Said Spock, turning the cards over to reveal twos. "Vulcans do not lie."

McCoy scowled at him. "Well you couldn't have been this lucky!"

Spock cocked his head. "I have also told you before that I do not believe in 'luck' or 'coincidences'."

After a pause he added, "Your turn, doctor."

Growling, McCoy took his deck and pressed it until all the cards went flying in Spock's face. "Four threes." He responded hotly.

Kirk, eavesdropping from the hallway, had to suppress a giggle at the sight of his first officer. The Vulcan had cards balancing on his shoulders and in his lap and even had one on the top of his head! He wasn't the only thing hit; the cards had been thrown everywhere.

Spock didn't move for a moment. He blinked a few times and let the silence sink in.

He put down his last card.

"One four."

McCoy pointed. "BS!"

Raising his eyebrow, Spock calmly turned the last card over.

It was a four.

McCoy slammed his head down onto the bed in defeat, covering it with his arms. "Ugh!"

This is where Kirk couldn't take it. He cracked up. The sight of the two fighting over a card game, one even covered in cards, was irresistible. He sat down and leaned against the wall, laughing.

McCoy, hearing this and knowing precisely who it was, looked up. "Oh great." He mumbled.

Spock nodded, serenely taking the card off of his head to stare at it. "Illogical."

He saw McCoy turn to look at him. The doctor was beaming. Then, he broke off into his own fit of laughter.

The Vulcan next to him just cocked an eyebrow in response showing him that, in his own way, he was laughing too.

* * *

**A/N:** Here's the first chapter out of four. Yeah... I had been playing BS with my friends a lot so that's probably why I chose that particular card game. I wrote this up in one day so be a little forgiving. Oh and please no flames. The next chapter should be McCoy and Kirk.


	2. McCoy and Kirk

_**McCoy and Kirk**_

"**O**h, here comes trouble." McCoy groaned, abet jokingly, leaning back in his seat even more as James T. Kirk stormed almost violently into his sickbay.

Kirk gave him a look that made him freeze. "Not in the mood, Bones." He quickly grabbed the glass of whiskey that had been sitting on the good doctor's desk before swallowing it almost whole.

McCoy recovered from his shock. He smiled. "Gee," He started, the classic southern accent shining. "Trouble on the farm?"

The captain turned to share a knowing look before turning away and sounding out a low. "Hmmmph."

"Well…" McCoy said kindly, reaching for his desk. "Alright then." He pulled out his handy bottle of whiskey. Kirk smirked; the doctor was probably the only one on the ship who could really get away with that.

As McCoy poured himself a generous portion, Kirk took the time to ask casually, "Anything going on here, Bones?"

"Nothing much." He replied, tipping off the captain's drink as well.

"Really?" Kirk pulled up a nearby chair and sat down on it, leaning towards his friend. "What about cards?"

The doctor looked up, any trace of a grin fading fast. "What about cards?"

Kirk laughed softly. McCoy's blue eyes just got wider. He set his drink down. "Nothing."

McCoy nodded.

Letting the silence fill the room, Kirk sipped his drink.

"So did this trouble have pointed ears?"

Quickly turning towards the owner of that out-of-the-blue statement, Kirk was about to utter the word _'Touché'_ but thought better of it. He leaned back in his chair in a relaxed pose. "Bones I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh really?" McCoy responded jokingly, eyebrows up high enough to be at Spock's normal standard.

"There are no elves aboard this ship."

It took a moment. Kirk grinning as McCoy's face went almost completely blank. Even a Vulcan would have been proud of the expression. After the moment was over, however, the doctor shined a brilliant smile before laughing, the captain joining in.

Recovering first from the hilarity, Kirk wiped his eyes from the laughter-induce tears. He turned to McCoy, who was still laughing. "So you want to play a game?" He started laughing again.

McCoy was brought into the present at that. Slowly letting his giggles die, he asked, "What?"

"A game." Kirk chuckled. "Maybe one with cards…!" Tears came up again from the amusement.

The doctor sat straight up. "That's not funny!"

Kirk sat in his seat, still cracking up. "You sure? It's pretty funny from here, Bones!"

McCoy glowered at him. "Damn it, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a laughing-stock!"

Nodding, Kirk brought the jokes to a stop. He still smiled. "Sorry, Bones."

"Well you should be." The doctor folded his arms and sat scrunched up in his seat. He reminded Kirk of a five year-old who'd just been insulted.

He stood up. "Seriously though. Let's play a game." McCoy opened his mouth to say something and Kirk interrupted. "It'll help us relax." Taking this in, McCoy nodded before trying to add another thing. "Alright, no cards." Kirk intervened again.

"Yep."

Kirk looked around the room for something, anything that would work. It was a sickbay after all. There was no real form of entertainment. Medical machines, scanners, instruments, trashcans…

Trashcans!

Much to McCoy's amusement, Kirk excitedly pulled the nearest trashcan towards them.

"What are we going to do? Recycle?" McCoy jibbed.

Kirk held up a finger, signaling the universal, _'Wait a moment.'_. He pulled open a random drawer. Going unsatisfied, he pulled open another. "Aha!" He called, pulling two items that looked suspiciously like straws.

He handed one to a rather dubious McCoy. "Jim, what are we doing?"

Kirk picked up a random sheet of paper off of the doctor's desk. Before consenting with McCoy, he tore off a piece of it and stuck it in his mouth. He chewed on it a bit before putting the straw to his mouth and, finally, spitting it through the straw and into the trashcan.

"How about that?"

McCoy looked at him. Was the captain really suggesting a spitballing contest? He took up on it. "We used to do this in Georgia." He replied, standing up. "But not from such a place where a child could hit it." He pulled the trashcan farther across the room.

He sat back down, ignoring Kirk's amused stare. He tore off a piece of paper and repeated the actions that Kirk had done. Except, he got the wad into the trashcan from a farther distance.

Kirk stood up again. He stalked towards the trashcan. "I _was_ just testing you. But since you're such an expert…" He moved the can even farther away. He turned back to the other man. "On the farm we used to sit on the porch and hit cows." He sat back down and got the wad into the can again.

"Hmph." McCoy grunted before getting another wad into the trashcan.

Kirk took the challenge and the two alternated. At a point, McCoy moved the can to the opposite wall, getting the wad perfectly in the can.

"Beat that."

Ignoring McCoy's smugness, Kirk aimed, stood up, and fired.

The wad went in.

McCoy stood up, shouting. "That doesn't count! You stood up!"

"We never agreed on any rules, doctor." Was the calm reply.

"You sound like that pointy-eared--!"

"Well he would have been right!"

"No, because you cheated!"

Kirk broke off the argument, laughing again. McCoy stared at him, incredulous. "Bones, look at us!" He giggled. "We're fighting about a spitballing contest." He cracked up again. McCoy smirking before lightly joining in.

"True, you don't even know where those straws have been!"

Kirk quickly dropped the straw he was holding, causing the doctor to laugh anew. "Let's do something else." He suggested, grimacing.

"Like what?"

Kirk shrugged. "Karaoke." He walked out the door, fully expecting the doctor to follow him.

McCoy stayed behind for a moment, though. "We have karaoke on this ship?" He started towards the door before remembering something. "Hold up, Jim! I've got the whiskey!" He grabbed it before running after the captain.

* * *

Spock had never heard of this place. He'd worked on this ship for twelve years, a hundred thirteen days and he'd never heard of this place. When was this said Karaoke Bar installed on the Enterprise?

A crewman had mentioned it in the hallway. Spock instantly picked up on the conversation and his curiosity peaked (which, despite what a certain Leonard McCoy had to say, was _not_ an emotion). He requested the location and now found himself in the corridor, heading toward it.

His hearing picked up on a rather disturbing sound. Was that…? No it couldn't be…!

He found himself at the entrance to the room and found that it was, indeed, a karaoke bar. But that was not what was interesting.

There, on the smallish stage was his captain and Doctor McCoy, hanging on to each other in an apparent drunken stupor. Singing.

Despite himself, Spock's jaw dropped.

"_Don't you know that  
There ain't no mountain high enough…"_

The two sang in unison, swaying violently. Spock covered his ears, the two were horrible singers! Spock analyzed this for a moment. He figured that if cats could sing…. They'd hate it too.

_  
"Ain't no valley low enough  
Ain't no river wide enough  
To keep me from getting to you…!"_

Doctor McCoy sang the last word, rather high pitch before shouting loudly, "Gudnight, ev'rybody…!" He fell over backwards.

Kirk was left standing. He peered over at McCoy drunkedly. "Bones?" He asked, completely out of it. "I'm gunna keep goin'…" The doctor, on the ground as he was, obviously had no answer.

Spock decided to retreat. He had no desire to see the captain make a fool of himself. Well… maybe he did, but his ears still would not appreciate it.

From the hallway, Spock could hear Kirk starting off with a familiar tune in Starfleet.

"_Beyond the rim of the starlight_

_My love is wondering starflight…"_

Spock allowed himself to smirk at this. The captain was probably ready to fall over as well, judging by the fact that his singing in this song was significantly worse than the last. He had a feeling that Kirk would regret this in the morning.

"_And while he wanders the starry seas_

_Remember… remember me…"_

With the short song over, Spock stopped for a moment. His superior Vulcan hearing picked up a significant and telling thud a second later.

Yes, the captain would _definitely_ regret this in the morning.

* * *

**A/N:** Second chapter! Yey! Sorry, it took longer than I expected to update. I went on vacation and all I had was the internet on my phone. Yeah.. Some notes here, the song "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" is not mine. The last song that Kirk sings is actually the words to the Star Trek theme song (Sing it to the theme tune, it works!). Oh and for you real nerds out there yes there was a Big Bang Theory shout out in there! Thanks to my _two_ reviewers **Dedicatedfollower467 **and **Nonneke. **To **Dedicatedfollower467**, I have to say that I have the same problem. I have no problem with slash whatsoever but I'm not a sucker for romances. I read a really good story called _Cake_ by and that is what inspired me to write this. As for the rest of you, I'm getting alerts about subscriptions so I know you are reading. Why not review!? Pweaze? The next story should be Kirk and Spock.


	3. Kirk and Spock

_**Kirk and Spock**_

**K**irk stealthy made his way to Spock's door, carefully holding the bundle behind his back. He did not know why he was trying to move so quietly. Maybe it was just the silent atmosphere on the ship. The ship had been finally allowed shore leave on Spacedock twelve after rather… harrowing… mission. Currently the ship was only occupied by maybe thirty personnel, Scotty, Spock and himself included.

He had been all for shore leave. He and Bones had even made plans to hit the nearest bar. But something had changed when Mr. Spock had decided to stay aboard. No one, Kirk figured, should be alone today.

So he stayed.

Kirk rapped lightly, on Spock's door, knowing that it was well within the Vulcan's range of hearing. When no immediate answer came, he rapped a bit harder, calling his first officer's name.

He heard movement after this, and the door soon opened. And there was Spock, still in his uniform but looking like Kirk had interrupted his sleep.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Spock." He apologized. "If you were sleeping I could just come back a little…"

"No apologize necessary, captain." Spock responded dutifully, he gestured for Kirk to come in.

Kirk carefully stepped into the Vulcan's living quarters, careful to avoid the gravity step*. The heat hit him at once but he ignored that for his friend's sake.

He heard the door close and Spock walked over to him. "Would you like some tea?"

He was about to say 'yes' but stopped himself. He sighed and took the plunge. He took the object that was behind his back and presented it to Spock. "Merry Christmas, Mr. Spock."

Spock took it from him. It was a present, he thought, for him… It was wrapped in a shiny navy blue paper, its size being smallish but not too small. Not that any of that mattered to him.

Kirk watched as Spock analyzed the present, seemingly staring at every part of it. He smiled kindly, "You're supposed to open it."

"Of course." Spock responded quietly, moving to open it. With skills that Kirk had never seen, the Vulcan got the paper off without a tear or a scratch. Then Spock saw what it was.

For his part, he kept up the emotionless mask, but Kirk knew him. He watched as Spock's eyes widened just a little bit more than usual and he _knew_ that Spock was in astonishment when the Vulcan slowly sat down on his chair, sighing.

He spoke up. "Did your mother ever celebrate Christmas with you?"

Spock looked up at him, he seemed speechless. "My mother…" He shook his head.

Seeing the first officer's look, Kirk asked with care, "Are you alright?"

Nodding, Spock took the item and held it to his chest. "Where did you find this?"

A small smile came to his face. "Pulled some strings." He recalled. "I searched on the subspace radio and found this in the record files."

Spock nodded and stood up, and, walking over to his desk, carefully put the framed photo of Leila Kalomi on it.

Kirk grinned. He had thought that it was a long shot. That his friend would view the gift as 'illogical' or even be embarrassed by it. But Spock had admitted that the time with her had been the only true time he'd been happy…

The voice of his first officer brought him into the present. "I hadn't expected…"

Kirk quickly interrupted him. It was completely viable that Spock had nothing to give in return. "That's fine, Mr. Spock, you don't have to give me anything."

Spock just cocked his head at him. "That is not what I was referring to." He walked over to a nearby drawer pulling out a small object. "I was going to give this to you after your shore leave." He started, looking awkward for a Vulcan. "But since you decided to stay…" He offered the gift to Kirk.

Kirk looked at Spock's gift. It was a four by four inch box covered in shiny gold wrapping paper. His mind warped. Spock knew…

He carefully started peeling at the paper, attempting the same feat as Spock. When he realized that he couldn't get to it without tearing he looked up at the Vulcan. Spock raised an eyebrow. Smirking, Kirk just tore the paper off. He opened the box and found…

A hunk of metal.

"This is very nice, Mr. Spock," Said Kirk, taking the metal and looking at it from all angles. "But what is it?"

Spock put his hands behind his back in his usual pose. He said, with just a _tiny_ piece of pride. "One of the last remaining pieces of the original Enterprise."

Kirk's eyes widened dramatically. He quickly took a better hold of it, for fear of dropping it in shock. Spock had gotten him… He… Kirk looked back at Spock, in awe. "I don't want to know how you got this."

"Agreed."

Kirk took his new found treasure and studied it. It was shiny and obviously polished. Spock must have gone to a lot of trouble to pull this off. A feeling struck him and he decided to voice his thoughts.

"You do know that you _are_ one of my best friends right?"

Spock looked over to him, eyebrows up to the hairline. "Affirmative."

Kirk cautiously walked closer to him. "It's not very Vulcan, is it?"

"It is illogical. But…" Spock faltered, almost as if knowing the words but daring not to say them. Instead he looked back at Kirk, his dark, grey eyes conveying his exact thoughts on the subject.

Kirk smiled in response.

Nodding, Spock looked down, as if willing himself to do something. Slowly, he brought his hand up into Kirk's range, eyes clearly telling the captain to shake it.

Kirk's jaw dropped slightly at the gesture. Spock never willingly initiated contact with… anyone. He was a touch telepath and that would mean…

Cautiously, as if afraid that Spock would flee from his touch, he took his hand.

He waited a moment. Spock seemed fine from the look that he was giving him. Suddenly, a feeling rushed up in Kirk. A hand shake wasn't enough.

Kirk pulled on Spock's arm and, despite the Vulcan's superior strength, pulled him into a hug. Spock immediately tensed up, just as Kirk knew he would. He hoped this wasn't too much for him, he thought, what if Spock reacted badly to this? His fears were soothed when the Vulcan visibly relaxed in the embrace, neither returning it nor breaking free.

Kirk sighed. You couldn't expect miracles.

Once again, Spock surprised him. Still not returning the embrace, Spock put his head down on his captain's shoulder. This time, Kirk tensed a bit, but not in apprehension. After all of this time and the Vulcan still managed to astonish him.

Slowly, he released Spock from his hold, never wanting to be too imposing. They stared at each other knowingly for a moment.

"Thank you, Jim." Said Spock. Kirk nodded and smiled kindly at him.

It was McCoy's entrance that brought a peaceful ending to the moment. He walked carefully, but seemingly joyously into the room. "I knew that you two would be here."

Kirk smiled a bit, looking over to Spock, who arched an eyebrow. Neither knew what this was about.

"Bones," Kirk started, the doctor listening. "Weren't you on shore leave?"

McCoy blushed slightly, shrugging. "Yeah, but its Christmas and you two are here. So…" He put a rather ridiculous looking Santa hat on his head and pulled out a bottle with a bow on it from behind his back, putting some glasses on Spock's desk. "Merry Christmas." He popped the bottle open with skill.

Kirk smiled.

Spock just said. "Doctor, you do know that Vulcans do not drink?"

McCoy started pouring, voice calm and even… friendly. "I know, and just for you, Spock…" He looked up at him, blue eyes shining. "It's sparkling apple cider."

* * *

* A "gravity step" (or, at least, I think that's what it is called…) is when there is a difference in gravity. If you walk from one room with one gravity and another with a different one, it causes a sort of… step-like feeling.

**A/N: **This was one of the harder things to write, since Kirk and Spock have the more famous of the friendships in Star Trek. Oh and yeah… I know the description says humor… and I was going to write a piece with Kirk and Spock about pie (which I will probably reference to in the next chapter), but this piece, once it got stuck in my head, seemed way more appropriate. I'm rather proud of this one. Thanks to my six reviewers. Please review some more! :D (PS: This is still not a slash)


	4. The Big Three

**A/N:** Wow… reviews. Thanks everybody! I would like to point out that this chapter is back to humor, which was my original intention.

* * *

_**The Big Three**_

**C**olors, mused Kirk, make all the difference. He looked around the recreation room that the three had somehow managed to get all to themselves. The three had been through some rough times, over the latest happenings. They needed a break or, as McCoy stated, they would "embrace a break_down_". Kirk, for once had agreed.

But, he still had to bully Spock and McCoy into agreeing to his idea of a "break". Spock had wanted to take some time to put himself into a trance while McCoy just wanted to _sleep_. Kirk had nothing against trances or sleep but he was neither tired nor a telepath and he wanted to do something together.

"Like painting." He'd said.

Both doctor and Vulcan thought that was a horrible idea. Kirk responded that he _was_ open to suggestion. The usual brawl came into play between Spock and McCoy before Kirk jumped in as referee. "Gentlemen," He had said, "I guess we are going to paint."

And there they were.

Kirk looked over his shoulder at Spock. The Vulcan was using a pencil with some skill, working at a large piece of paper.

He sighed. "Spock, I said we're going to _paint._"

"Yes, you did Captain."

"That usually involves paint."

Spock nodded, never looking up from what he was doing. "It does. But unlike you, I'm sketching, which requires a pencil."

"Ah." Mumbled Kirk, turning away from the first officer to McCoy. The doctor had painted an interesting image. "What are you painting, Bones?"

McCoy, obviously resenting being there painting, said in an overly sarcastic tone, "I'm sure you can guess."

"So it is a—"

"Yep" McCoy kept painting.

Kirk couldn't let this go. He put down his brush and turned fully towards McCoy. "Bones?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you paint a pie?"

Next to him, Spock put his pencil down to turn curiously towards McCoy. This, he figured, would be interesting.

McCoy kept painting until the weight of the two's humored stares fully took hold. He put his brush down. "What's wrong with painting a pie? I'm hungry and I haven't had a good southern pie in years!" He looked at the other two, daring them to tease.

They did not disappoint. Sharing a knowing look with the captain before continuing, Spock said, in his matter-of-fact voice, "Doctor, if you are hungry why would you paint an image that made you more so? It seems rather illogical."

McCoy's brows just furrowed even more than before. "It's still a better pie than either of you two ever made!"

Laughing at the memory of Spock and himself, Kirk actually agreed. "True… you don't have singed eyebrows." He looked back at Spock, remembering their failed attempt to make a pie for McCoy's birthday. They'd neglected to check if the temperature was in Fahrenheit and had put it in Celsius instead, causing them to light the pie, the oven, the kitchen and, in Kirk's case, his eyebrows on fire.

Completely serious, McCoy agreed, his accent once again flaring up. "That's right! And you're so quick to talk but what are _you _painting, Jim?"

Kirk's smile vanished as McCoy thought it would. The captain turned to Spock for back up but the Vulcan's interest had shifted from McCoy to him. He looked at the doctor before both stood up and stared at Kirk's painting.

McCoy was shocked. "Jim… what is that?"

Kirk stood up, annoyed. "What do you mean 'what is it'?"

McCoy started to laugh. "Sorry to burst your bubble Jimmy-boy but I have no idea," He pointed at the painting. "What _that_ is."

That's not right, Kirk thought. He turned to Spock, hoping he'd be his usual logical self. "_You_ can see it, right Spock?"

Both of Spock's eyebrows were raised to a considerable level. "That," He indicated the painting. "Is totally and absolutely…"

"Yes?"

"Unrecognizable."

McCoy started laughing anew. He sat down, laughter-induced tears blurring his vision.

Kirk glared at him. "That, _gentlemen_," He started. "Is a flower."

That apparently was enough to send McCoy into hysterics again while Spock walked closer to the painting and leaned down to stare at it at an up-close level. "Captain, I do recognize the image."

"What?" McCoy stumbled, Kirk turning back to smirk at him.

"Yes, the image is very compatible to that of a noxious particulate gas."

Hearing this McCoy beamed.

Kirk was beyond frustrated at this point. "What are you smiling at? At least it's better than a pie."

The doctor stood up immediately in the defense of his pie. "No it's not! Pies don't kill people!"

"Neither do flowers!"

Pausing, McCoy mockingly mulled that thought over. "No Jim, you're right. Flowers don't kill people. But noxious gasses do."

"You're right of course…" Kirk picked up his brush. "I mean--!" He flicked pain on the doctor, getting him in the face.

McCoy blinked through the orange paint. "What are we children?!"

As if answering that question, Kirk threw some yellow paint at him, hitting him in the chest. McCoy stared at his formerly clean blue uniform. This was war. "That's it!" He grabbed a handful of thick red paint, throwing it at the captain.

The target was hit. Kirk took his turn stare at the red. This will never come out, he mused. Another attack came, black smattering him in the front. "Bones!"

McCoy, holding the paint can, looked bemused. "You have to admit it Jim. It still looks better than that 'flower' of yours."

Spock, having decided to stay out of the fight and opting to move his sketch out of the range of fire, was mildly trying to gain the two's attention. "Gentlemen, if we could just—"

Paint hit McCoy, interrupting Spock. McCoy flung paint right back.

"I'm a starship captain not an artist!"

"That's _my_ line!!" McCoy cried, throwing the paint that was left in his can at Kirk.

Kirk sputtered for a moment before regaining his senses and throwing an equal amount back at the doctor.

Total anarchy ensued.

McCoy jumped at Kirk, who caught him but momentum threw them both to the ground. They were soon throwing paint again, reaching for the nearby cans on the floor and getting at each other at point-blank range.

Spock, at the nasty look of this, quickly rushed over to them. "Jim!" They ignored him. "McCoy!"

The doctor looked up immediately at the sound of his name. He smiled mischievously for a second before pulling the reluctant Vulcan into the brawl. Spock at once moved to get back up and out but Kirk pulled him down while McCoy just dumped an entire bucket of green paint on him.

Spock retaliated, quickly getting out of the captain's grip and getting a handful of purple paint at McCoy's face.

Kirk grabbed him again, holding on tighter than before. Spock struggled slightly before clapping his head with at least two handfuls of yellow paint. Kirk, shocked, let him go.

As Spock scrambled to get up and move, McCoy ingenuously stuck out his foot. The Vulcan, partially blinded by green pant, fell pray and fell over. He hit a table on the way down, a stay can of blue paint tipping.

It dumped itself right on top of his head.

Blue and hazel eyes stared at him for a moment before the humans in the room broke out into another bout of laughter. Spock pulled himself into a sitting position, spitting blue paint out of his mouth and attempting to rub his eyes clear of the fluid.

"Illogical." He mumbled. Kirk and McCoy once again started cracking up.

He stared at them for a second. Paint ran down his face from where it had collected in his hair. He shook it slightly, trying to clear his vision. An idea struck.

Kirk and McCoy were largely ignoring the Vulcan, laughing at what had just transpired. Spock took the time to shake his hair clean, trying to get all of the blue mess out. The paint flew everywhere, and the spray hit the humans.

They stared at him again for a second. Spock looked a bit drier but, he looked… blue… and his hair stuck out at places due to the thickness of the paint. He looked mildly pleased at getting them back though.

McCoy was smirking. Kirk was outright grinning. He stood up and held out his hand to help Spock up. Spock took it, pulling himself upright and looking around.

"Captain."

Kirk smiled warmly, looking ridiculous with all of the colors of paint splattered on his face. "Yes, Mr. Spock?"

"I hope you weren't attached to your… 'flower'."

Kirk turned to look at his painting. It was covered in a whole bunch of different colors of paint.

McCoy chuckled, standing up. "I think it actually looks better than it did before."

"And what about your painting?"

McCoy's pie had faced the same treatment as the "flower". Parts of the pie could be seen, but most of it was covered with paint. "Masterpiece." McCoy declared, confident.

"Yes doctor," Spock agreed, McCoy looking at him. "You could relate it as an abstract representation of society's attack against… pie."

"That I could, Mr. Spock." McCoy joked.

Kirk looked around. "Spock where's your painting?"

"When you two started your… battle," He explained. "I moved it out of rage." He moved over to the corner of the room that he had deemed safe and picked the picture up by the tripod, moving it over to where the captain and doctor could see.

It was remarkable. The sketch was amazingly detailed and obviously poured over with some amount of pride. There was no color; Spock did not need to use it as pencil was the obvious choice. Kirk was tempted to touch it. He could actually _see_ the panels on the outside of the image.

Spock did not know what to make of Kirk and McCoy's silence. "It is not yet finished." He attempted to clarify.

McCoy turned to look at him, dreadfully serious. "'Not finished'? Spock this is amazing!"

Spock cocked his head. "Thank you, doctor."

Kirk turned to face him. "Spock… why did you paint _this_?"

Spock's brows furrowed. "When I asked you what image to make, you responded that I should draw 'home'."

Turning back to look at the picture, the Kirk smiled. "Of course, Mr. Spock."

The amazingly detailed picture was, of course, of the Enterprise. Spock had gotten all of the angles right. She was floating through space, stars visible but not taking any attention away from her beauty. The picture seemed to radiate the same feeling as the real ship, a sense of adventure and exploration.

"Well done, Spock." Kirk commended again.

The door opening behind them caught their attention. Scotty walked in, looking down at a PADD. "Captain," He started and then looked up. His jaw dropped.

There, in front of him were the other three of the main senior officers. And all of them were covered in… paint? McCoy and the captain were substantially covered, ranging in colors from yellow to black. Spock, however was more of a sight. The Vulcan was obviously the one most drenched in paint, but only being covered in blue and green paint. His hair was sticking up at odd ends and paint was running down his face.

The three stared at him, looking as if _he_ was the insane one in the room.

He smiled at them a bit awkwardly. "Oh – emm… It ca' wait until later, sir." He backed up out into the hallway, not turning around. The doors closed behind him.

He let out a breath of air before continuing down the hallway. "Me grandma' always used to say," He started saying, smiling and talking to himself. "'Monty, son, know matter who ye are, you're bosses will always be a wee bit crazy. But ye have to trust 'em.'"

* * *

**A/N:** That is the end… rather sad isn't it? I would like to mention that I do read every _single_ one of my reader's reviews and I would like to say that I'm rather humbled by the response. Starting out at 2 and ending at over 16 reviews isn't bad. I would like to clarity some things for these reviewers. Chapter one was based on a night of me coming home, sleep-deprived after a long game of BS with my friends. There were some complaints on the beginning of chapter two… In the beginning just imagine any problem that Kirk could have on the ship and that's what happened to him. I would have to say that the end of chapter two is the better part. Oh and the Big Bang Theory (the television show) was referenced by Spock's mentioning cats listening to Kirk and McCoy's singing. Chapter three is my favorite chapter. The original plot _is_ mentioned in Chapter four but the new one is so much better. When I wrote it I thought I might be flogged for the hug and hanged for the shoulder thing. But nobody disapproved of the hug and I only received one issue with the shoulder thing. I myself do not think that too intimate, but that _is_ just me. By the way, I do know that Leonard Nemoy does have brown eyes but in books I've read I've heard them described as grey, so hence the confusion. This last chapter was just an idea that I had that I liked and I loved the idea of this ending. Thank you all reviewers. This experience has convinced me to write some Star Trek one-shots in the near future thanks to you all.


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